#1975 Come on Irene – the hurricane that wasn’t

Me and Tom Bull shaking in our boots.

Call me immature but I got really excited about the hurricane. Here in America everything seems to me like a movie so I was getting all amped up picturing taxis rolling down the Avenues, power lines flying out of the ground and all sorts of crazy stuff that I’d be filming from the safety of my apartment window. But here’s what really happened: It rained quite a lot for about five hours and at 3:30am it started to get pretty windy and then I fell asleep. The pot plants on my neighbour’s balcony are looking healthy, my street is bone dry and the electricity and water never shut off. As a natural cynic and a terrible supermarket shopper, I have exactly one bottle of water in the fridge and one jar of peanut butter sitting in my cupboard. But it doesn’t matter, the deli on my corner is already back open and making their world famous chicken sandwiches. As far as once in a generation storms go, I don’t think we got our money’s worth here in New York. But here’s what did happen yesterday.

1. I ran into Australian model Myf Shepherd at said deli – she was stocking up on organic rice crispies and looking beautiful in the process.

2. A random Australian guy heard my accent while I was waiting in line to buy my foot long buffalo chicken Subway sandwich, laughed in my face and told me that the Wallabies beat the All Blacks in the second Bledisloe Cup match. I was like, “Is that cricket or something?” Passive aggression for the win.

3. I watched 20 episodes of Friday Night Lights. Never again will I subject myself to the scandalous lives of Manhattan’s elite. From now on it’s only small town Southern state high school football for me.

4. Tom Bull stopped by and asked me to take digital photographs of him in his underwear for his international agencies. I said yes.

5. I got about 10 panicked text messages from family and friends back home telling me to look after myself, proving that the media does a fantastically good job of hyping up a blustery day. Granted, the hurricane hit pretty hard in other parts of the area, but these were people who had been watching reports about what was about to happen to Manhattan.

6. #comeonirene became the go-to Twitter hashtag.

7. Every man and his dog threw a hurricane party. I stayed home because I didn’t want my clothes to get wet while waiting for a taxi.

8. I conducted a scientific, statistically accurate survey of one and surmised that if you took one particularly rainy day in Auckland and added it to one moderately windy day in Wellington, you’d have Hurricane Irene in New York City.


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  1. Sarah says

    i was in NYC last year when they had a storm, i think it blew over a tree in brooklyn THE NEWS WAS EVERYWHERE talk about mega hyping it up….i didn’t even notice it had rained. 

  2. says

    Ha ha re. #2 – you are so lucky to be escaping all the rugby shmugby bollocks here.

    #8 Sounds like when I was there in 1999 for Cyclone Floyd – like a stormy rainy Auckland day!

  3. Jmallcho says

    …and where are the rest of these said underwear shots? hmmm?

    (also, where can I find Bonavita underwear? I googled to no avail…)

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